Vanessa Bohns
New Book — October 6, 2026

Should I Say Something?

The Science of What to Share—and What to Keep to Yourself
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We all have moments in our daily lives when we wonder not only how to say something, but if we should say it at all.

A field guide for navigating moments of doubt

We all have moments in our daily lives when we wonder not only how to say something, but if we should say it at all. In Should I Say Something? social psychologist and organizational behavior expert Vanessa Bohns explores how to make informed decisions about when to express something and when to keep things to ourselves. Making the case for this vital communication skill, Bohns helps us determine the difference between oversharing and showing appropriate vulnerability, ultimately helping us to find support, feel less alone, and gain perspective.

Grounded in social psychological research, this book serves as a field guide for navigating moments of doubt about whether to say something. Bohns examines common inner conflicts, such as asking ourselves if we should be honest, apologize, or hold back in an interaction. Highly entertaining and eminently practical, Should I Say Something? addresses a modern-day pain point — the fear of being disliked, offending others, or getting cancelled — and offers concrete solutions.

Should i say something vanessa bohns hc

Praise for Should I Say Something?

SHOULDSAY SOMETHING is a wise and generous book that is also deeply useful. Bohns reveals how often we misread other people’s desire for feedback, underestimate their appetite for truth, and overestimate the benevolence of staying silent. She then encourages us to push past either-or thinking and to approach our relationships with a long-term view. What I especially love is that she takes human beings seriously – as moral actors, social creatures, and people capable of being both tough and kind.

— Daniel H. Pink, #1 New York Times bestselling author of THE POWER OF REGRET and DRIVE

In this deeply compelling and practical book, Vanessa Bohns explores the science of what we should share, what we should keep to ourselves, and how to get smarter about these often consequential decisions. Blending cutting-edge research with counterintuitive tips, Dr. Bohns offers a roadmap for navigating some of the most critical moments in our personal, professional, and everyday lives.

— Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, Professor of Business Psychology at University College London and Author of Don’t Be Yourself: Why Authenticity is Overrated and What to Do Instead

This book will change how you give feedback, share news, and handle every difficult conversation you’ve been avoiding. Vanessa Bohns delivers a framework that’s both fascinating and truly useful.”

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New Book — October 6, 2026

Vanessa Bohns

Vanessa Bohns is the Braunstein Family Professor and Chair of Organizational Behavior at Cornell University’s ILR School. She is an expert on social influence, compliance, consent, why it's so hard to ask for things, and why it’s so hard to say no. Professor Bohns holds a PhD in Psychology from Columbia University and an AB from Brown University. Her research has been published in top academic journals in psychology, management, and law, and has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Atlantic, The Economist, and on NPR's Hidden Brain, among other media outlets. Her writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review, Fast Company, Business Insider, and elsewhere.

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A 2021 Best Book for Ethical Leaders & a Financial Times Business Title of the Month

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You Have More Influence Than You Think - Vanessa K. Bohns